Excerpt from New Mr. Tech Book on Telecommuting

As I promised, more techiness for your geeking enjoyment.   I've been head down in a book for some time.  Hoping to release it by the end of this year, early next year.  I'll be talking about how to be a telecommuter.  There are so many great tools out there that are free or inexpensive that enable the average person working in an office to work from home, full or part time.

According to one survey, 62% of firms have remote workers and 34% of employees surveyed, work away from the office.  For those job seekers, being telecommute prepared can allow you to save money and time in commute and gas.  Following is a short excerpt from Mr. Tech's, upcoming,  book on telecommuting. 

How to work from Home - Introduction

I work from home, set my own schedule, except for meetings during the daytime.  Us telecommuters have to make some concessions to those that still have to work in flourescent light jail.  Sorry guys, but there is a better way, and you don’t have to get on the freeway every day, and you don’t have to go siteat a boring desk under flourescent lights like some bad nightmare from a comedy about working in such a place.

People ask me all the time, “How do you do it”?  I got tired of telling everyone, so I decided to write a book.  That way, next time someone asks, how I did it, I can hand them a business card with my number and a link to the website where they can purchase my book.  If it works for them, it only cost the price of a book.  If it doesn’t, they bought me  a couple of martini’s at a decent establishment, and someday maybe I can return the favor.

I have been doing this for around 20 years now and salaries have varied, but I make a decent living, live where I want the only requirement being decent Internet access.  Other than that, the beach, the mountains, another country, all are fair game.  As long as your work gets done, you are available when needed, and you can do it consistently, you’re in.  All you need is a few tips a plan and some elbow grease.

This is not a get rich quick manual, this plan will involve hard work.  I will also say this type of work is not for everyone.  You have to be a “motivated self starter”.  You have to be able to work on your own with little direction, and most importantly, you have to put in your time.  It’s very easy to fall into the trap of not putting in a full work week.  The flexibility to be able to take a day off when you want, and a long weekend every once in awhile, can quickly turn into a job-ruining slack fest.

This book will delve into all of those issues.  From humble beginnings to a full fledged telecommuting machine.  This book will give you the tools to succeed as a telecommuter and point you in the right direction in the types of training you will need, and the types of jobs that are available to telecommuters.

The future is now, throw away your commuter mug, and get one of those nice fat cups that takes up a large area of your desk, and prepare to join the growing ranks of the remote workforce.


I'll post more juicy tidbits soon.  The following is from the Introduction and gives a bit of background on the author and his qualifications on the topic of telecommuting.

Airline Passenger Bill of Rights .. Take out passenger and you got it right.

It's sad that it's come to this. Most of the airlines are so lacking in customer service it's amazing they are still in business. Oh yeah I almost forgot, they provide bad customer service, people stop flying them, then they ask the government (meaning us taxpayers) to bail them out.

I was in Phoenix recently and I saw a lady go up to the ticket counter and the agent said "Hello How are you today?" The lady responded "Not to well, I haven't been treated very nicely by your fellow employess". Now the woman was not belligerent, she was not agro in any way. Rather her tone was very conciliatory and rather downtrodden. The agent however that it was necessary, in front of me, to take the lady aside, and start wagging his finger in her face and tell her that "If she didn't shape up her attitude that she wasn't going to get on the plane"

I see things like this happen alot. Airline employees seem to have free reign to treat the customers any way they like and any time anyone complains or has an issue with the service passengers are threatened with not being able to get to their destinations. These days I just suck it up, try to keep my head down and not be noticed. I don't want to miss a business engagement because some Airline ticket agent is having a bad day, or they don't like the look of me or my attitude.

Anyway the Airline Passenger Bill of Rights had all the bite removed from it and is now a watered down version of the original that removes any real protection to us consumers, gives the Airlines lots of leeway, and really doesn't address the problems experienced by travelers. I'm sure the Airlines are breathing a sigh of relief, us passengers are left wondering why our elected representatives don't really represent us at all.

Overweight Passenger Forced to Buy Second Ticket

Well it's about frickin' time I say.

I can't tell you how many times I've had to sit next to an overweight passenger that overflowed into my seat.

I paid for my space, If I don't fit in it, then I need to buy more space. Simple as that. If I do fit in my space, it's not fair that I should have to share that space with someone who comes over into my seat.

Anyway, good on ya Southwest (Although I think you're recent dress code issues were taking it a bit too far).

Southwest Makes Big Guy (430 lbs. worth) buy a second ticket.

Hot dog for breakfast? Go to jail.

Another one that makes you go WTF? What is this person tryng to communicate? I asked the person inside he truck and he said it was on there when he bought it, it looked kind of wierd so he kept on there.

New Airport Security Express Lane

Too bad nobody was using it. They only have these in a few airports and it costs $99 a year to join up. This one was in San Jose. The person at the checkpoint said thay are "Negotiating with other airports". I'm taking the wait and see approach. Once I see them in more airports, then I might plunk down the up front cash.

Pilot Conversations

I found this funny little bit, in the forums of the guild that I play World of Warcraft with.

We're all a bunch of old farts that still lay video games. I digress though. In my travels I've met quite a few pilots, and while I can't say for sure whether this is completely true or not, I can just see these guys saying things like this.

Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We have digital watches!"

Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees."
TWA 2341: "Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"
Tower: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff line: "I'm f...ing bored!"
Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!"
Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f...ing bored, not f...ing stupid!"

O'Hare Approach Control to a 747: "United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, Eastbound."
United 329: "Approach, I've always wanted to say this... I've got the little Fokker in sight."

A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, "What was your last known position?"
Student: "When I was number one for takeoff."

A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down.
San Jose Tower Noted: "American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport."

A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich , overheard the following:
Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is our start clearance time?"
Ground (in English): "If you want an answer you must speak in English."
Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany . Why must I speak English?"
Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war!"


Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7"
Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway."
Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?"
Continental 635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern... we've already notified our caterers."

One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said,

"What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?"
The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours and I'll have enough parts for another one."

The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one's gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign: Speedbird 206.

Speedbird 206: " Frankfurt , Speedbird 206! Clear of active runway."
Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven."
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, -- And I didn't land."

While taxiing at London's Gatwick Airport , the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727.
An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going? I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!"
Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God! Now you've screwed everything up! It'll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don't move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?"
"Yes, ma'am," the humbled crew responded.
Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking:
"Wasn't I married to you once?"

The Story of Naked Guy on Spinning Bull

After some poking around I finally found out what exactly the statue is trying to communicate. Apparently the statue was commissioned by one of the founders of the company. The bull represents one of their competitors and the naked guy is them leaping over the competition. Go figure.... Guess that's art.

Naked Guy On Spinning Bull?

Some things just make you say OMGWTF. Both the bull and the guy on his back are anatomically correct and what this sculpture is supposed to signify is somewhat beyond me. I found this outside of a high tech company I'm working at this week. There was no placard on it so no name or sculptor.

Tunes in your mobile

I have one of those new phones that stores my mp3's. The only problem is that I have yet to find a decent device that will play my music on the car stereo. Leave it to those forward thinking engineers at Chrysler to put an auxiliary jack right in the front panel of the in dash stereo. Next time you rent a car, ask for the Chrysler. You can plug your mp3 player in and cruise down the road in tuneful bliss.

Southwest Airlines, good rates, feel like cattle

Ah yes, this trip to San Diego reminded me of the Joy of traveling on Southwest Air.

I'm not sure what the reasoning behind this is, but there's no assigned seating.

They way it works is there is an A, B or C printed on your ticket. Then you queue up in your respective line, then they open each gate in alphabetical order, A first, then B, then C.

Then the way it works ism, you kill each other for the best seats. If you're in the C group, you can just suck it up in the middle seat. It really makes you feel like cattle and the vibe when you look at another passenger is more of a "You better not get my aisle seat, you bastard" kind of of a feeling rather than a "Hey fellow road warrior, sup?" state of mind.

I guess the theory is, that it loads and un-loads planes faster, but I just don't see it. Maybe they save 3 or 4 minutes.

Being 6 feet 3 inches tall, I always reserve an aisle seat, on other more civilized airlines, where they allow you to reserve a seat.

The only problem is, Sometimes Southwest has ridiculously low fares, or they have a direct flight to where I need to go when nobody else does. So sometimes you just gotta roll the dice and hope you get the seat you want.

So I'm back from San Diego, off the flying cattle car, and not really ready, but have to anyway, it's back to work. I'll be schlepping around the Pit (Silicon Valley) for the next couple of weeks, and there's a trip to Cleveland, Ohio in there somewhere too. I'm going to go slide on some snow tomorrow in the Sierra's and be back on the road Monday.

Uneventful Travels,
GT

Smoker's Pole

Are people who use these 'Pole Smokers'?

Travel Advice for the Un-initiated

I will pass along a few tips I have picked up in my years as a traveler, in the hopes that it will maybe make your life easier. To be honest it's not really out of any altruistic motivation that I impart these pearls of wisdom. It's really in the hope that I won't be stuck behind your sorry, clueless ass because you are fiddle farting around and didn't pay attention. Selfishness aside, lets move on to the reason for this post.

Before You Arrive
---------------------

1. I use Kayak, it has all of the major carriers (except Southwest :( ). You can easily pick the time you want to leave and arrive, put in multiple stops, etc. My boss turned me on to it and it's really the best way I've found on the next to find the right flights and times. NOTE: If the link from Kayak does not go directly to the airlines but instead to Orbitz or Cheap Tickets, get the flight information and book it directly with the airline. If you don't book directly with the airline it gives the airlines one more excuse not to reimburse/compensate you if there's a problem with your flight. The same goes with hotels and rental cars, go straight to the source.

2. Check in on the airline Web Site - Some airlines allow you to check in and print your boarding pass at home. If you can't do that, use the self service terminals near the airline check-in counters. This will save you time. NOTE: Make sure to read all of the fine print. You may not be able to use Web Site check in, if you have checked luggage.

3. Travel Light - Use the roll away luggage that will fit in the overhead bins, don't check luggage and it will cut 30-60 minutes off of your travel time easily. NOTE: Be prepared to "Gate Check" your luggage on smaller planes. Ask at the ticket counter before you get board. Otherwise you'll hold everyone on the plane up after you figure out you can't fit your bag in the plane and have to get back to the front of the plane to give it to the flight attendant to check.

4. Print out or Write down your flight information and have it handy. Get your ID out and have it ready as you will probably need to show it more than once. If you are leaving the country make sure you have your passport.

5. Take a bath. Nobody wants to sit next to your stinky ass all the way from California to New York. And while your at it, that breath mint I'm offering you, it's not because I'm being all nice and sharing, it's because the malodorous stench emanating from your festering gob is about ready to make the hair on my head leave their follicles and migrate to a more hospitable environment.

6. Measure your ass. If you can't fit the bar down that separates one seat from another, you need to purchase enough seat to hold your ass. No offense to fat people, but DAMN! Get your ass outta my seat.

At the Airport
-----------------
1. Paste on a smile and suck it up. Probably the number one rule. I've seen this a hundred times at least. Traveler talks to airline personnel, traveler is justifiably angry and vents anger at airline personnel, airline personnel politely tells traveler that there is nothing they can do to help and they're terribly sorry, as the airline personnel think to themselves "I've got your customer service hangin'". If you paste on the smile, suck it up, and ask them, please if they could assist you with your problem, chances are they'll still think to themselves "I've got it hangin' right here buddy", but at least there is the oft chance that they will actually assist you with your problem and do what they can to help. If you go in with an attitude you reduce your chances of getting help to somewhere around zero. Just remember, when using air travel, not only does shit happen, shit happens ALOT.

2. Have your ID and your boarding pass in your hand and ready when you get to the first checkpoint. Fumbling through your bag or pockets to find your ID or boarding pass is bad form.

3. No you can't take liquids through the checkpoint. No that water bottle can't go. You can technically take bottles of 3 ounces or less in a 1 quart plastic bag. You have to take the plastic bag out all by itself when you get to the x-ray machine, and at some airports you have to present it to a preliminary inspector. I avoid all the hassle and leave the liquids at home. You can take stick deodorant and all your other toiletries, except for: shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste and shaving cream. Those things you do not bring, you can get at the hotel on the other end. Make sure you call ahead and that your hotel has what you need before you arrive (most decent ones do).

4. As you approach the X-ray untie your shoes and take your laptops out of the bags. The shoes must go through the X-ray machine and the laptops have to go through all by themselves. Check your pockets for metal, belt buckles, money clips, etc. Having to go through the checkpoint multiple times because you forgot metal on your person increases your chump status in the eyes of your fellow travelers.

5. No you cannot take those lighters through. Check your pockets man!! Toss them before you get to the x-ray machine.

Getting On The Plane
-------------------------

You'd think this would be simple but so many people mess this one up.

1. Yo! Get out of the frickin' aisle! If you are near the front of the plane and there are people that need to get by, step out of the aisle and wait to "F" with putting your stuff in the overhead rack when there is nobody waiting to get by you.

2. Hey that's my stuff in there. When you do put your things in the overhead rack. Be considerate of other peoples stuff. GENTLY, move it aside, but don't smash it to get your stuff in.

3. Get to your seat, sit down and keep your hands and arms inside until the vehicle comes to a complete stop. Don't get up, wander around, talk to your buddy in the seat 5 rows back, or go to the bathroom. Sit down and buckle up.

Getting off the plane
------------------------
For some people this is even harder than getting on, but with practice, it's a skill that can be easily mastered.

1. Yo! Get out of the frickin' aisle! - If you have stuff in the overhead bin and you can get it out quickly, then do so. Otherwise, wait for the people that can operate an overhead luggage bin to pass until you can figure out the operational details of the in-flight luggage storage unit.

2. Yo! Get out the frickin' aisle! - When you get off of the plane, don't stand around in front of the gate exit looking for where to go next. Move along citizen, get out of the way and off to the side before stopping to make sure your head and other body parts are still attached.

I'm Traveling to Sunny (we hope) San Diego next week for a family vaction. I'll post some pictures of our wandering and the interesting folks we meet along the way. Until then these words of wisdom - taken from a poster

It Could Be that the Purpose of Your Life Is Only to Serve as a Warning to Others.

Travel Tip #101 - Get a room that is empty

On a recent trip to Texas, I got in rather late, or really early, however you want to look at it. I do the credit card/ID dance with the front desk person and stumble blearily to my room.

I take the room key from my pocket and slide it in the door, hear the click of the latch, open the door and see a guy standing there in is BVD's, who says "Hey I'm in here".

Being now fully awake, I make my way back to the front desk and ask the person there if "I can please have a room that does not already have someone in it".

I suppose that if it were a couple of Swedish bikini models in the room I might have thought "Man this new hotel points program is great".

But as it was, I should have asked for my room, without guest. So remember road warriors, your travel tip for the day is, when you check in, make sure you ask for the un-occupied room option. Unless of course you'd like to redeem some of your points..

Driving in Texas

Dallas freeway at rush hour. Poor guy, shouldn't have had that second breakfast burrito.

Welcome To My Blog

When I found out that my neighbors cat had a blog, I figured, it was high time to start a blog of my own.

I travel around the US quite a bit in my traveling type job, and I have my handy Treo 700p, so I figured I'd post some pictures from around the country of people and places and share them with the blogsphere.

I've been around in the computer business for 20+ years, Play WoW, Snow-Ski, Disc Golf, and enjoy spending time with my wife and two kids.

I'll probably be bashing the l-user's quite a bit in this blog, and I also enjoy watching the completely insane things people do. Along those lines, you've got to check out fark.com
most likely one of my favorite all time sites.

I'll start out with a couple of technology links that the geeks in the crowd will enjoy.

The Tao of Programming - If you are in the technology business - know it, live it
Simon - BOFH - "What was your user name again?"
Tech Support Nietzsche Style - "Our product is obviously too complex for you"

And leave you with this thought.

There are those that manage what they don't understand, and those that understand what they don't manage, then there are those that just don't manage to understand.

LA Library - Librarian Action Figure with Real Shushing Action!

Librarian Action Figure - With Real Shushing Action!

I found this one while checking out the gift shop at the LA public library. I would think if it was an LA librarian action figure she would also need the Kung-Fu grip.